More Obama Plans for America??

With the recent learning about His Highness, the Obamaness’ deep and complicated Energy Plan (Keep your tires inflated)…

… it should be time to look at some more possible plans the Anointed One has for other issues facing America.

Here’s some issues, and then some solutions that have about the same great thinking that went into them.

1. Property Crime =
Don’t have anything worth taking. After all, we in the Government want all you have anyway.
2. Violent Crime =
Give thugs anything they want (see #1), and maybe they will let you live.
If they do pulverize you, we have an excellent health-care plan we are proposing (see #4).
Certainly don’t cling to guns as a way of protecting yourself!
3. Transportation issues =
Skateboards and Heelies are the way to go! They are cool and don’t use polluting oil.
Do NOT Drive a V8.
4. Health Care =
Drink a V8. We will provide Free Health Care For All… unless you do anything we don’t like.
For instance: Smoke, eat unhealthy, vote wrongly or say unkind things about Democrats, etc.
Doctors will be paid minimum wage, like all Americans not in Government Service.
If a few die it will decrease the surplus population.
5. The economy =
See #1, above.
6. Terrorism =
Be nicer to “insurgents” and they may let you live. (See #2, above).
If not, you probably are an evil American & deserve it.
7. The War =
I understand the French have agreed to provide us with all the white flags we need!
8. Education =
Spend more and more on worthless programs, and less in the classrooms. Do-away with private,
parochial, and home schools (Way to go, California!) so there is no artificially high-ranking school system to compare our fine Government schools to, making us look bad. Discourage merit pay, so all teachers are paid the same. Emphasize cultural learning about sex ed, liberalism, and such. Do away with any attempt to teach real American-centered History or Civics. Buy more Apples for the Unionized teachers.

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How could President Obama (I call him that because the election is just a formality) handle other important issues?